My Go-To Jewelry

I love accessories - heck, I design and buy accessories for a living - so it's no surprise that I love jewelry. While I appreciate fun fashion pieces that add an extra something to an outfit, the ones I wear daily hold a very special meaning. Keep reading for the details on each of my most-treasured items.

Graduation Ring

Instead of a class ring for high school graduation, my parents wanted to get me a ring that I could wear for the rest of my life and not look so dated. I chose a two-toned ring that is very classically Tiffany & Co., and have worn it on my index finger every single day for the last 13 years. 

Engagement Ring

No explanation needed as to why this is a special piece of jewelry (read about how Greg proposed here!) but I did recently have my diamond reset. I was cursed with thin fingers and large knuckles so my wedding rings never quite fit right - they would spin endlessly on my finger which was very annoying. Soon after we got engaged, I ordered some plastic ring snuggies online and they worked well in terms of keeping my ring in place. When we got married and I added a wedding band, I simply used a wider ring guard to hold them together so they wouldn't knock against each other. 

During pregnancy and post-partum, my already-larger knuckle grew even bigger and I could not get my wedding band on and off anymore. I resorted to only wearing my engagement ring since it is thinner and I could still get it over my knuckle. After 4 years of wearing a piece of plastic (that would get dingy and stretched out) on my most prized possession, I was over it and wanted a more permanent solution. 

For our 3-year wedding anniversary last October, we went to a local jeweler to discuss my options. Sizing beads were the best bet but would require re-sizing my rings a quarter size larger and adding the beads to the inside of the band. Rather than shelling out to pay for re-sizing and adding the beads to both my engagement ring and wedding band (which could still bang against each other with my oddly-shaped finger), I opted to completely reset my engagement ring and continue wearing it solo. 

I almost exclusively wear yellow gold jewelry (with the exception of my graduation ring mentioned above, but even that is mixed metal) and decided if I was going to commit to just one ring, I wanted it to be simple, classic & timeless. Pave bands were very on-trend when Greg and I were dating and almost felt like it was the only way to go, so he got exactly what I asked for - a radiant cut diamond on a white gold pave band. But as I've come into my own in the last few years, really discovering myself in my 30s, the yellow gold solitaire felt more me. I could not be happier with the outcome, which was custom designed at the same jeweler that did my mom's engagement ring. 

For the record, I kept my original wedding band as-is and save it for special occasions to wear as a right-hand ring since my knuckle isn't as large on that hand - go figure!

Engraved Bar Necklace

A few months after working for Ron Jon Surf Shop, I went to my first tradeshow in Miami for swim week and our team was invited to the Billabong after-party. They had hired an amazing Etsy artisan to make complimentary custom necklaces at the event. I chose a yellow gold bar necklace with a single wave engraved on it. The wave has several meanings for me, which have only expanded as time goes on.

Firstly, I'm an Aquarius. Secondly, I grew up on an island, love the beach and work for a surf shop. As the years have gone by, the wave symbolizes even more. When I was pregnant with Jack, Greg and I would walk on the beach by our bungalow every day and talk about life, our future and our son. The beach is my happy place - walking along the shore in the crashing waves is nothing short of therapeutic. 

The wave has recently taken on a deeper meaning as well. If you've seen series finale of The Good Place, you'll know what I'm talking about. If you haven't - watch this clip. I'm not a religious person, but am spiritual, and the way Chidi describes death and the mysterious after-life in the most poetic way really resonated with me. 

Initial Necklace

Greg gifted me this initial necklace on the morning of our wedding day. The "B" is for my new last name - Buckman. I love the simplicity, and recently had it shortened to sit perfectly in between my collar bone so it layers beautifully with my bar necklace.

My Favorite Podcasts

More often than not, I'm listening to a podcast while getting ready for work, on my daily walks or while sitting at my desk analyzing sales. My weekly go-to podcasts include topics such as motherhood, health & wellness and pop culture. The below shows are some of my favorites. Would love to hear yours too as I'm always looking for something new to add to the mix.

Armchair Expert

Plantbased, Not Perfect

The Blonde Files

Almost 30

The Skinny Confidential

HERself

Smartless

On Purpose

Raising Good Humans

Mama Said

Office Ladies

Call Her Daddy

Currently Obsessed

For the last few weeks, I've been sipping on kombucha a couple times a day and it has helped my digestive issues associated with suspected endometriosis. Kombucha is a fermented tea that is filled with probiotics that help restore the gut microbiome and good bacteria, which in turn have reduced the chronic pain & discomfort I've been dealing with. I go through about half of a bottle a day, drinking 1/4 mid-morning and 1/4 mid-afternoon as a snack between meals. There are so many brand and flavor options available. My current favorites are GT's Synergy Multi-Green, Mystic Mango and Strawberry Serenity, and Health Ade's Pink Lady Apple and Pomegranate.  Kombucha would also be a delicious cocktail mixer when lounging poolside this summer :)

Looking Back on 2020

{Grace Oliver Photography}

WHAT. A. YEAR. We've all been impacted by 2020 - between a global pandemic, racial injustice, the presidential election, and all of the challenges that came with the uncertainties during this time. I have gone through many highs and lows in the last 12 months and feel extremely fortunate to have my job, my home and my family. My heart goes out to the millions of people in our country and around the world who are not able to say the same. 

This year started strong with my husband throwing me a surprise 30th birthday party in January, and soon slipped into a very different reality. It's weird to imagine that just a year ago we felt comfortable hosting a large gathering, and now I have a favorite face mask and my hands are perpetually dry from washing them so much. Quarantining in late March, all of April and the beginning of May brought some of my darkest days and loneliest nights. 

In the midst of the national shutdown, Jack was extremely sick off and on for weeks. It all started when he had an allergic reaction to amoxicillin that was given in response to his first ever sickness and ear infection. He had hives covering his entire body. He tested negative for coronavirus, strep and mono several times but had a high fever that was not responding to medication, and he began limping. We could not comprehend how Jack was getting sick back to back when he wasn't even leaving the house. Greg and I were switching off doing only essential outings and were very diligent about wearing our masks, sanitizing, wiping down the groceries, etc. We spent countless hours at the doctor's office until we eventually landed in the ER at Nemours Children's Hospital in Orlando. Because of covid restrictions, only one parent was allowed to accompany Jack, and what followed in the next 4 days was a nightmare. 

{waving to Dada from our hospital room}

Watching my son being poked and prodded for numerous blood tests, having a catheter inserted for a urine sample, getting multiple X-rays and ultrasounds, being sedated through anesthesia for an MRI - was truly painful for me, as I had to not only try to comfort him through it all, but also help restrain him so the doctors and nurses could do their job. Trying to be strong for my son and hold back tears while I was scared and playing out every scenario in my mind was awful. Being alone in a hospital room not knowing what was wrong with my 16-month old child was the worst experience I could ever imagine. Greg was my rock. He parked outside the hospital for 4 whole days, waved to us from our room's window and brought me iced coffee every morning, along with any other essentials to make us more comfortable. Jack and I FaceTimed Dada, Nana and Pop Pop constantly in between tests and resting. Jack nursed pretty much non-stop since that was the only thing keeping him calm through his pain. 

Jack's fever and inflammation levels finally came down and we were discharged without a clear diagnosis, despite every team at the hospital looking for answers. Multiple doctors from Infectious Disease, Rheumatology, and Orthopedics came to see Jack, trying to figure out what was causing these fever episodes. We were able to rule out cancer, lupus, septic joint, and anything truly serious. That hospital stay was one of the hardest times of my life. Jack and I have had a strong bond from the moment he was placed on my chest after birth, but I think in the wake of what we went through together, that bond is even deeper. He knows that no matter what, Mama is there for him.

{sick snuggles}

We landed back in the ER one month later and the doctor that night thought maybe it could be Periodic Fever Syndrome. She immediately called the rheumatologist and set up a follow-up appointment with the specialist. After 5 episodes in 8 weeks, with fevers up to 104-105 and lasting 3-5 days each, Jack was diagnosed with the rare, non-genetic, auto-inflammatory disorder PFAPA. Periodic fever, aphthous stomatitis, pharyngitis, cervical adenitis (PFAPA) is characterized by fever, mouth sores, sore throat, enlarged lymph nodes, inflammation, and sometimes joint pain that occurs at regular intervals (typically every 3-8 weeks). The cause and trigger is not known, and it is not contagious. 

We have a treatment of oral steroids to be given at the onset of an attack and it has helped eliminate the episode entirely. Luckily the frequency of Jack's episodes have slowed down recently, with our longest stretch being three months between flare-ups. The outlook is good - most children grow out of PFAPA by their second decade of life, with no negative effects to their growth and development, and are otherwise healthy as the disorder is relatively benign. Nonetheless, it is terrifying and heart wrenching to watch your child go through something that neither of us can control. 

I don't want Jack to miss out on anything because of an episode and that unknown is tough for a worrier like me to overcome. He had a flare-up on the day of his first school pictures and I know it's such a small thing, but it broke my heart that he missed it, and made me think of the other events in the future (soccer games or trumpet recitals, birthday parties and field trips) that he might not be able to attend because of PFAPA. Greg and I have been absent for multiple days of work to be home with Jack to administer the steroid and comfort him through the attack.

{turning the corner and playing with the heart rate monitor}

Jack's health has been at the forefront of every single agonizing decision Greg and I have made this year. Sacrificing seeing our family and closest friends, going out to eat at a restaurant, or getting a haircut for fear of contracting the virus and subsequently passing that to Jack, whose immune system may not be able to handle it, has been absolutely devastating. Weighing the risks to leave our house and not be literal hermits is exhausting and challenging every day. I have cried more tears this year than I ever have, and I am so thankful to have an incredible support system in my husband, my parents and Jack's care team, who have gone above and beyond to help us through this diagnosis. 

This year has been excruciatingly hard, but I know I will look back on 2020 with a grateful heart - grateful for our quality time together as a family and memories made in our home. We had so many wonderful days this year too, and they are that much sweeter with this newfound perspective. On Jack's good days, I relish in the moments of laughter and playfulness, knowing in the back of my mind that tomorrow may bring his illness without warning.  

Of all the lessons I've learned this year, the biggest one that stands out is to be kind. You never know what someone may be silently struggling with. We've all been through it this year in more ways than one, and having some empathy and giving others grace will stick with me long after 2020.

Beauty Swaps

Sharing the beauty swaps I've made this year in an effort to be more intentional, environmentally friendly and aid in my current lifestyle.

{Versed Day Dissolve Cleansing Balm}

First up, I switched from makeup remover wipes to a cleansing balm. To think that 350+ makeup wipes end up in a landfill every year just from my own use is mind blowing. I started using the Versed Cleansing Balm and I love it! It eliminates every trace of makeup, mascara included, and leaves my skin feeling super soft. I follow it up with a second cleanse of Cetaphil and then slather on my nighttime skin care routine. Versed is a vegan, cruelty-free and clean drugstore brand, available at Target. This is the first product I've used from the line, but have read glowing reviews on others too.

{Amika Bust Your Brass}

Since going back blonde, I've been using a purple shampoo to help combat the brassy tones that creep in between salon appointments, which have been dragged out even farther in the era of coronavirus. My current favorite is Amika Bust Your Brass Cool Blonde Shampoo. Not only is it super effective & affordable, but it also smells amazing and doesn't have the horrible ingredients in other shampoos (parabens, sulfates, phthalates). A little goes a long way - I use a dime-sized amount once every 7-10 days so one bottle lasts a long time. I've trained my hair to go longer between washes and currently only shampoo twice a week. When I'm not using my purple shampoo, I stick to Amika's Vault Shampoo & Conditioner which locks in my color.

{Summer Fridays Jet Lag Mask}

Finally, I've been trying to find more clean & natural products and one of my favorite brands is Summer Fridays. I have used their Jet Lag mask as my overnight moisturizer for the last year, and their Vanilla Lip Butter is heavenly. I also just ordered the Overtime Mask after trying a sample - it smells like pumpkin and exfoliates my skin so perfectly. I have yet to test out any products outside the OG masks, but I've heard great things about the CC Me Serum which is loaded with Vitamin C. I follow one of the founders, Lauren Ireland, on Instagram and her blog (You & Lu) - she is a super-relatable working mama to a toddler with another one on the way.

Dear Jack - Part 2

You are officially 2 years old today, my sweet boy. This year has definitely had its challenges, but even with all the uncertainty, darkness and division that 2020 has brought, you have been my guiding light through it all. It is unbelievable how much you have changed in the last year - taking your first steps in February, starting two days a week at "school" in March, chatting up a storm, and blossoming into your personality. You are so cuddly and affectionate, playful & charming, particular, smart and silly.

I never want to forget how hard your little arms squeeze my neck when you give hugs. I never want to forget the way you grab my hand and lead me around the house to follow you, your little feet pitter-pattering on the wood floor. I never want to forget the sound of the words you innocently mispronounce and how you always go on "two" when we count to three. I never want to forget the way you squeal when you and Dada play, and say "agin" over and over. I never want to forget those six weeks of quarantine, I will be forever grateful for that extra quality time together as a family.

 You are the most loved little boy and are so lucky to have the most amazing village around you. Your Nana and Pop Pop are two of your favorite people and the feeling is definitely mutual. You love to catch lizards in the backyard. Your favorite color is orange. When you try to do "thumbs up" you stick up your pointer finger and I love it so much. You would rather be outside than anywhere else, especially if it involves the beach or a swing. You talk in the third person and call yourself “Jack” or “Bubbaaaa” if you’re doing something mischievous. The best part of your bedtime routine is dancing in the kitchen when you snuggle into the nook of my neck and melt into my arms. 

Seeing the world through your eyes has shifted my perspective - to slow down and enjoy the journey, to see the positive and remember what is most important in life. Being your Mama is my greatest gift. Life just gets better and better with you and I want to soak up every single moment. 

Happy Birthday Jack Man! Love you to the moon and back.

My Relationship with Exercise

{after completing the Melissa Wood Health Method water workout}

Health and exercise has looked different in many phases of my life:

+ I was a competitive dancer in middle school and early high school. I battled an eating disorder and ultimately quit dance my sophomore year. Although I overcame anorexia and exercise bulimia, I still struggled with negative self-image.

+ In college, I pretty much did cardio exclusively: logging hours on the elliptical and the occasional spin class. But you can't outrun a bad diet and I was not fueling my body with nutritional food. Think: pizza, pasta, fried food and alcohol.

+ While living in California, I began eating cleaner and started adding weight-training and yoga into my cardio-focused routine and really started seeing a change in my physique. Although I no longer owned a scale because I would get obsessed with the number, I dropped almost 20 pounds over 9 months and felt amazing.

+ Before our wedding, I was motivated to reach my ideal goal, so I started a Paleo diet and ramped up my at-home weight-training to 3 days a week, ran 3-4 miles a couple days a week and one day of yoga. I felt so confident when I walked down the aisle.

+ During my pregnancy, I continued to eat healthy but stopped the strict Paleo diet, and was walking almost every day, up until the day I gave birth. At 6 weeks postpartum, I was back to me pre-pregnancy weight but my body composition was totally different. I lost a lot of muscle, my midsection was wider and I felt low-energy (also thanks to not sleeping with a newborn!).

+ The first year with Jack, exercise took a backseat other than walking with the stroller twice a week. 

When 2020 started and I turned 30, I knew I needed to make myself a priority for my mental state more than anything. I wanted to find a new routine that I could stick to and fit into my already hectic day as a working mother. In early February, based on a recommendation on Cupcakes and Cashmere, I downloaded the Melissa Wood Health app and started the 7-day free trial. I was hooked after day one. The MWH Method is a low-impact pilates and yoga based workout with classes ranging from 10-45 minutes, and focus on everything from total body, arms & abs, lower body and booty, etc. She also offers a treadmill series, water aerobics, pre- and post-natal exercises and guided meditation.

It's been 7 months since I started MWH and I feel better than ever. I aim to complete a 20-30 minute class (sometimes two shorter classes) Monday-Friday every morning before work. I wake up, make the bed, pour myself an iced-coffee and pick which class I want to do that day. The low-impact and meditative approach is ideal for the morning, minutes after I've gotten out of bed, instead of a crazy HIIT workout, dripping sweat right after opening my eyes.

I'm seeing such a difference in my body, which I did not expect with the short videos and simple moves that are deceivingly hard and burn in the best way possible. I'm also still walking as much as possible: two long walks on the weekend (over 3 miles each day) and going for a 15-minute walk on my lunch break a few days a week. I've lost inches all over my body, toned my legs, arms, and even Greg commented on my abs showing through! Melissa has coined the term "long lean lines" and it could not be more true. I feel that her workouts enhance my natural curves. I still don't like to weigh myself but base my progress on how my clothes are fitting and how I'm feeling. My posture, which has always been horrible especially with a desk-job, is getting better, as I'm more mindful of my body alignment throughout the day.

When it comes to nutrition, I'm making healthy choices, but not restricting any major food groups. It's essentially a Mediterranean diet - focused on plant-based meals with plenty of fruits, veggies, whole grains, light meat (seafood and chicken), a little dairy, and limiting processed foods, sweets, alcohol and red meat. I also like the 80/20 rule of eating clean 80% of the time and leaving the other 20% to enjoy life - ideally in the form of cookies and red wine.

I spent so much of my life hating my body and focusing on my "flaws," but have finally found peace in the body I'm in. After growing a human, birthing my baby and nursing him for a year and a half, I look at my body in a different way - as Jack's first home, as his nourishment and comfort. I now celebrate  my body for what it is, rather than tear it apart for what it's not. I care more about being healthy and strong instead of skinny. 

I'm loving the new balance I've found through Melissa Wood Health - I feel stronger, centered mentally, less anxious, more present, and overall healthier. It is so attainable (I workout at home every day), affordable ($9.99 a month!), and I can fit it into my schedule with ease (whether it's early AM before Jack wakes up, during his nap time, etc). I'm continuing my mission to move every day, even if that means squeezing in just 10-minutes, I feel so much better. The mental shift after carving out some time for me, in turn allows me to show up better in my roles as a wife, mother, employee, daughter and friend.

*This post is in no way sponsored, I'm just sharing the program that has truly transformed my life in many facets.